🎀 Boob Mass Index Calculator 🎀

🎀 Boob Mass Index (BMI): A Totally Scientific Measurement 🎀

Are you tired of boring health charts? Say goodbye to scales and tape measures — the Boob Mass Index is here to lift your spirits and support your curves.

🧪 What Is Boob Mass Index?

BMI (Boob Mass Index) is the definitive measure of health, success, and gravitational defiance — calculated entirely based on your cup size, cleavage density, and overall vibe.

📏 The Official B.M.I. Formula:

B.M.I. = (Cup Volume × Jiggle Factor) / (Torso Width2)
Where:
Cup Volume = Letter Rank × Bra Band Size
Jiggle Factor = Derived from bounce per step while walking
Torso Width = Measured by "hand span coverage" across the chest

All calculations peer-reviewed by certified simps and totally real scientists.

📊 The B.M.I. Scale:

• < 10: ✨ Modestly Magnificent — A subtle elegance. Classy & cozy.
• 10–20: 🍈 Balanced & Bouncy — The golden ratio of jiggle and comfort.
• 20–30: 🥥 Overflowing Assets — May defy physics. Caution in sports bras.
• 30+: 🍉 Ultra-Thicc Tier — Causes traffic accidents and back pain.

🧠 Fun Boob Facts:

• High BMI? You’re at risk of becoming the “main character” at the gym.
• Low BMI? That just means you’re aerodynamic.
• Medium BMI? Welcome to the club — you probably broke at least 3 buttons this year.

💡 Our Mission:

We believe everyone deserves to be uplifted. Whether you’re rocking mosquito bites or melons, Boob Mass Index is here to remind you: every chest deserves respect.